What I would invent if I had the time and some cash

Picture this:
Pasty executives all across the land, sitting in front of a computer monitor, going about their afternoon routines... ignoring the screams of their burning asses, aching carpal tunnels and twisted spines when suddenly bells begin to chime. The lights dim, fans pump in a nice breeze and a sweet Barry Manilow song pours itself through the speaker system. All the employees smile, open up their shirt collars and sit back because they know... they know it's time for "Desktop Tanning".

Thats right, Desktop Tanning. As the employee transitions into a more peaceful state, their computer monitor shuts down and reboots as a facial/upper torso tanning machine. For 10 solid minutes, whether they partake of the carcinogenic rays or not, everyone is relaxing and rejuvenating under the spell of Copacabana.

You know the song...
"Her name was Lola, she was a showgirl
With yellow feathers in her hair and a dress cut down to there
She would merengue and do the cha-cha
And while she tried to be a star, Tony always tended bar
Across a crowded floor, they worked from 8 till 4
They were young and they had each other
Who could ask for more?" (than a desktop tanner!)

And if your loving this idea, have cash and access to the bowels of the scientific community, contact me... I think I'm really on to something here. Actually, I just didn't want to torture my husband with another of my "thought occurences", as I like to call them. They come frequently enough that if I don't start keeping some of them to myself, the rescue team is going to find him slumped over in the corner of our family room, in what appears to be a catatonic state, with a puddle of drool at his feet.